The happiness coach

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23Dec2014_00541
23 Dec 2014 | PEOPLE
Melayu 华文

The happiness coach

STORY // Koh Eng Beng
PHOTO // James Ng
English Melayu

Want greater joy and fulfilment? Let Guardsman-turned-life coach Lieutenant Colonel (LTC) (NS) Adrian Toh show you the way!

Alan (not his real name) was a chain-smoker who had just gone through a triple bypass heart operation. Yet, he still couldn't resist the allure of nicotine. But in just two hypnotherapy sessions with life coach LTC (NS) Toh, Alan kicked the addiction for good.

LTC (NS) Toh, a former Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) Regular, started his coaching company, Success Frontiers, early this year. He has since helped to better the lives of more than 1,000 people through personal coaching as well as public and corporate training sessions on peak performance.

Notably, he helped a couple facing extramarital woes to reconcile, a lady who was affected by her late husband's infidelity to come out of depression, and a woman to achieve a five-figure monthly income.

"I believe that people have unlimited potential; that they can release themselves from the bondage of their past and live life to the fullest," said the 44-year-old Guardsman who left the SAF in 2013 to become a full-time life coach.

Subconscious influence

LTC (NS) Toh teaches Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) which is a set of strategies that allows a person to replicate exceptional people's mental blueprint for success. But what's intriguing is how he resolves deep-rooted issues like depression and addiction. He uses Time Line Therapy and hypnosis to "speak" to a person's subconscious mind.

"The way we behave, act and react is often triggered by our subconscious mind. To change a behaviour permanently, we need to remove the negative emotions present in the subconscious mind," he explained.

During a Time Line Therapy session, he would typically help his client to enter a relaxed state, just like in a daydream. Through a series of questions, he guides the client through his or her life history to find out when a particular negative emotion or behaviour first appeared.

Using the example of a person with anger issues, he explained: "The subconscious mind always seeks to protect us. When the person was a child, he may have learnt that anger could protect him from getting bullied. But after he grew up, his bad temper affected his relationship with loved ones.

"He may consciously want to change, but his subconscious mind may say, 'No, your anger is protecting you from hurt'. His behaviour will not change until we are able to work with the subconscious mind, to find a better way to protect him."

Does it work?

All these concepts seem like pseudo-science, and when asked if life coaching really works, LTC (NS) Toh said: "If coaching does not work, then why do world-class athletes, rugby and soccer players engage coaches?

"A coach can help you see problems that you can't see, and help you to move forward when you are stuck. But for coaching to work, you have to believe that it can work."

However, he warned that because there are coaches of varying standards, one should always check their track records. "The way I coach, and the amount of changes that I have helped to create in people - definitely Premier League standard!" LTC (NS) Toh said confidently, who added that he was trained by Dr Tad James, the creator of Time Line Therapy.

LTC (NS) Toh first learnt about life coaching in 2006 when his unit attended a workshop conducted by Mr Adam Khoo, a well-known peak performance speaker in Singapore. He then went for training on his own, and started volunteering as a life coach in Mr Khoo's public workshops.

Indebted to SAF

Although he is glad to be pursuing his calling now, leaving the Army was not an easy decision. He feels indebted to the SAF because it gave him "an education, and a stable platform to have a family".

Coming from a broken family, he was brought up by his aunt and didn't do well in his studies. In Secondary Five, he signed up for the then-SAF's Local Sponsorship Programme for a non-commissioned officer (now specialist) career. But he earned himself a place in the Officer Cadet School by becoming his platoon's best recruit during basic military training.

"I never felt that I left the Army. It's still part of me, I even kee chiu (Hokkien for "raise hand". Means "to volunteer") to continue serving as an NS (National Service) officer," said the current 2nd-in-Command of 7th Singapore Infantry Brigade, and a father of four.

Big goal

He has set himself an audacious goal: to touch the lives of six million people. To realise his objective, he plans to write books, produce videos, and train a community of coaches. "Imagine how the world would be if we all believed in our potential. Believe in yourself, believe in your abilities. If you are stuck, come find me!"


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