Some say journalist Benita Teo must be very brave to put herself out there and do this. In truth, the Singapore Armed Forces Music and Drama Company (SAF MDC) are the real brave ones for saying "yes" to her co-hosting Recruits' Night.
I feel like I'm in a vacuum: I can barely breathe, my heart is thumping in my ear, and all my thoughts are racing at the speed of light. And it's dark all around.
The moments before the curtains rise are always the hardest.
I turn to my co-host, Corporal (CPL) Shrey Bhargava. He looks collected and confident, while I'm not even sure if I remember my first line.
The curtains open slowly, and the mass of recruits at the Basic Military Training Centre (BMTC) starts to grow before our eyes. The spotlights come on and like a supernova, we burst into life "BMTC, ARE YOU READY TO HAVE SOME FUN?"
(from right) CPL Shrey and Assistant Artistic Manager Edwin Tan running through the script with me.
Hearing it from the pros
I joke that I'm feeling like a celebrity as I memorise my script while my photographer Sian Liang drives. But inside, I'm shaking. Co-hosting Recruit's Night at BMTC may be the least death-defying of Firsthand assignments, but there is a very real threat of dying.
Of embarrassment, that is.
MDC has made a name for itself over the last 42 years, bringing cheer to our troops and boosting the morale of tired soldiers. The last thing it needs is a bumbling amateur.
Getting ready for the show.
"Everything will be fine! Come on, would I let anything go wrong?" CPL Shrey assures me chirpily.
Following our rehearsal, he has offered to sit with me and break down the show into its individual segments. This really helps because, between remembering the performance items and tracking my stage directions, I'm feeling overwhelmed.
At this moment, CPL Shrey's usual co-host, Lance Corporal Noah Yap, saunters by, and I freeze. You know that feeling when you see your significant other's ex and you think, "Gosh, this person's perfect, I'll never be like that"?
Luckily, he has a tip for me. He reminds me that co-hosting should be like two friends chatting and so there's no need to obsess about sticking to the script.
Before sending me on stage, the MDC team gives me one last piece of advice: "Smile. As long as your cheekbones are up, no one will notice you made a mistake."
Deer caught in spotlights
They make it look so effortless, but truly, hosting the one-hour show is intense - bombarded by the bright lights and loud cheering from the audience, it's hard to see or hear. This often leads to me staring stupidly at my co-host and nodding meaninglessly while he tries to banter with me from across the stage.
The sensory overload also makes it difficult for me to think about my cues. Thankfully, CPL Shrey holds true to his words. Once, I prematurely push him to the front corner of the stage to introduce a performance.
When he asks, "So, what's next, Benita?", I lower my mike with a calm I've never known and whisper, "I can't remember, actually." He whispers back, "It's okay," and, without missing a beat, announces the performers.
The performances give us a short respite and we stand in the wings to catch a breather.
What do we do while waiting? Sing and dance along to the songs, of course. Good music, good singing, what's not to love? After all, I have a lot of nervous energy to shake off.
Exchange of energy
The wings are also where we witness the magical interactions between the performers and audience. One of my most precious memories is seeing the look of amazement on one of the Camokakis (MDC's male vocal ensemble) when he turns to us mid-song.
With a predominantly male audience, the guys are pretty used to sister-band RhythmiX getting all the attention.
But on this night, there are female recruits as well and, for a change, the guys are being showered with some of the loudest cheers in the room. Even CPL Shrey looks astonished.
As the curtains fall on Recruits' Night and my night as a co-host, I'm still on a high. I finally understand when celebrities say they draw energy from the excitement of the crowd, especially after seeing the Camokakis' exuberance when they found their adoring fans.
The next time you watch MDC on stage, remember that they're working hard to make you smile, so give them a reason to smile too. I'll be cheering as hard as I can.
